Lifespan of a Chennette

I feel odd, not having been able to be online whenever I want, sending email, blogging, chatting, downloading stuff (stuff that shall remain nameless lest the wrong people think I am breaking laws of some kind…;-)) So, my last night in the hotel (or at least this hotel!) here I am. No meeting tomorrow, so no pressure to get any work done.

I have been in Barbados since Tuesday evening, but it’s not feeling like I am quite here yet. I have no stalkers, no fresh taxi-drivers and I haven’t hopped on a Z-van (or ZR-van, ‘Z’pronounced ZED). I haven’t been late for a morning class, ‘running’ down the hill fresh from the shower with no breakfast. I haven’t been counting any of those $1 coins to see if I can meander over to the cafeteria and buy a flying fish sandwich, or take a ZR into Bridgetown on a whim. Or lugging laundry down and uphill to campus machines since landlords in Barbados figured all students liked to handwash. Or walked down the hill (the ONLY hilly area in Barbados and it has to be where the campus is – with private student housing located UPHILL of campus) to “the Esso” where I had my first Bajan fishcake. I haven’t been walking much to anywhere at all. New buildings and developments. A PriceSmart! This certainly isn’t Barbados as a student. Nothing’s really familiar.

Scratch that. Apparently I was oblivious, but walking through the parking lot of a shopping centre, my 2 colleagues (Jamaican and Trini) also posted here for the period, suddenly started laughing, and said, “well girl, you making waves in this place – everybody stopping to look at you!” That is indeed familiar. Maybe Bajans are no more familiar with the hijab than they were 10 years ago. A certain person likes to tell how she was so paranoid in those days, thinking to herself that people were staring at her wherever we went- why didn’t Bajans like her? Until she mentioned it to me, and I pointed out that maybe they were staring at me. It wasn’t a big deal to her, so it never occurred to her that the hijab was a point of interest and consternation with other people. That’s one of the 100 reasons we’re still friends after so many years.

I never really notice the staring anymore, although years and years ago when I was younger I felt very self conscious, but back then I was self conscious about EVERYTHING. In T&T and Guyana it’s familiar enough that no one really notices. In Trinidad in particular you see hijabis all over, working everywhere, in schools etc, part of normal life. I only pay attention when I am at a meeting for work with outside people. Traveling in the past year through these regional airports made me realise that up the islands, the hijab isn’t something that people expect to see. They’re used to the sunburnt tourists. A Muslim? In the airport? What do we do?? Antigua in particular, seems to freak out when I pass through VC Bird International, devising different ways to scan me every time (always polite, but still you can see that it is a big thing for their security!). I hope that with my frequent travel I am part of their learning process. They finally understand the concept of search in a private area, females only. But it was still a very polite, multi-person production. I tried very hard and did NOT laugh. Traveling with work colleagues is fun though. They are so used to my hijab that they don’t realise I may fall into a category that requires “special attention”. They’ve left me behind at security unknowing so many times, assuming I was right behind them

But having people notice you isn’t always bad. People tend to remember me. It got me waved into a secure building this morning though. The guard recognised me from the days before and told my other colleague (the 4th of the team and the one in charge) “don’t worry, you can follow her, she’s been here before”. Even though we’d ALL been there the 2 days before

Now I must sleep. For it doesn’t look like I shall be any more constant in Barbados than I was in Guyana. At least next week I get to spend a few days in Trinidad!!